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If you’ve ever done any sort of international relief work, you know that a couple of things happen when you get home:

1. Some people want to know everything about your trip and, 
2. the other people just can’t wait for you to shut up about it.

Those expectations, either way, will affect how you are processing your experience. And, I would think, most people are unprepared to give an adequate account—short or long—the moment they step off the plane.

That brings me to my last experience. It’s been about a week since I returned from Haiti and I think I’m ready to share a few observations from my time there. And, like I said, these thoughts are still under development, subject to change, and ultimately unable to describe the totality of what God is doing there, or even just what He is doing through me.

1. Make someone feel worse for something they already feel bad about. Usually people know when they screw up, but in case they don't, make that your job.
2. Always find the negative in every situation. This will effectively cause people to not want to talk to you about things they are excited about.
3. Make someone feel small, so you can feel big. When you're insecure, this will help you feel better about yourself.
4. Always look for the opportunity to be able to say, “I told you so”. This will help you appear smarter than you really are.
5. Burst people's bubbles with “welcome to the real world”-type comments. This will help you feel better about your own disappointments.
6. Never encourage people or affirm their strengths. You're doing them a favour by making sure they never become proud.
7. Don't acknowledge or validate people's disappointment or pain. You're doing them a favour by helping them not wallow in it.
8. Default to “no” unless you have good reasons to say “yes”. Life is usually too easy for some people, so we're really helping them by making it a bit harder.

She was just one face in an endless sea of faces that all speak the same story. I met her quite accidentally. She had just arrived at a small orphan home in Africa; bruised, abused, and damaged, an orphan whose life had been counted as worthless. Afraid, distant and detached—something about the look in her eyes stuck to me. Her picture never left my mind, and Lillianna never left my heart. Her story inspired a bold venture to make a difference for Lillianna and the children of the Mukumu Children’s Home in Kakamega, Kenya. Two teams and more than 30 people raised more than $250,000 and took the trip to Kenya - building, planting, painting, and sharing in the lives of this child and 32 others like her. We witnessed the transforming power of love in action. The truth is, it really doesn’t take much to change someone’s world—just a decision to do something with the knowledge that you have.

In our experiential and consumer-based culture, we have placed way too much stock in the emotional component of our faith. Think about how you evaluate the quality of your spiritual walk. How much does experience and emotion play into your evaluation?

• “I haven’t felt close to God for a while.”
• “God hasn’t answered my prayers.”
• “God has felt distant lately.”
• “I read my bible, go to church, and try to pray, but I don’t feel any different.”
• “My spiritual life is dry.”

All of these types of evaluations are based on our efforts to “be close.” It’s as if contemporary evangelical spirituality is all about doing our part to find God’s presence and proximity. It’s as if He is allusively waiting for us to find the formula that activates His closeness in our lives. What a pile of unnecessary and unbiblical work. In my passion to experience God’s presence, I grew up looking more for an experience instead of Himself.