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Day 5
Darkness cannot drive out darkness only light can do this”Martin Luther King
How true this has been for the women we met today. Two years ago they were unable to tell their stories and we were afraid that asking about them would increase their trauma and pain. How right we were to wait. These stories now pour out from them and bring light into their lives. Their road to healing is a long one but they have started their journey with the help of their amazing support staff.
Today in both groups work was done to look at their three key issues around violence from yesterday and what small actions were within their control to address these issues. I realize that though some of their points were not within their control, it was important for them to document these as a hope for the future. Each group was able to come up with one action they could take to achieve their goal. We will follow up with how that would look at the next session.
We heard a story of how a generation can change. “Our father destroyed our lives (by starting another family) but my two brothers will never follow in his footsteps”
“Teachers at school should talk about bullying but they do not”
We talked about how mothers can build up their children and give a loving safe space to talk about this issue.
Self-care and respecting yourself was felt to be a first step in increasing respect between men and women. This has come up in other groups as well.
We ended the day by asking each woman to share a joyful happy memory from their past. Almost everyone was able to share
A highlight was a brother returning to a childhood home that had been demolished to find a plastic pen that was his young sister’s treasured possession as a last gift from her father.
For another it was cuddling with her siblings under a blanket while their mother told them stories
For another it was that they were able to escape the genocide in time and not be captured.
These women show such courage in the face of deep wounds and a life that is a daily challenge and yet though they have hearts that have shattered many times and continue to be these hearts are also filled with such hope and joy and love.
I feel so blessed to walk alongside them in the time we are here and will treasure their loving hugs for ever.
Barbara
